by Trapper Tom, Ring Announcer
November 20, 2011
An epically loud crowd welcomed the Keystone State Wrestling Alliance (KSWA) to Immaculate Conception School in Bloomfield as the Megastars made their last tune-up before December 3's FanFest extravaganza.
Jr. Heavyweight Battle Royal
At the beginning of the event, KSWA Owner Bobby O came to the ring told the fans about a stipulation with the winner of the Battle Royal. Bobby tells the fans that the winner of the match would be the last Megastar to enter the Gauntlet Match. Current Jr. Heavyweight Champion "The Ice Man" Tony Johnson, Kris Kash, Diamond Dave Diamond, The King and The Jester are all participants in the Gauntlet Match, as well as the Battle Royal. The action is fast and furious. Kris Kash wallops King with devastation chops. The Ice Man and Diamond Dave work together in trying to spill The Jester over the top ropes but he goes low on the two and gains an upper hand. The King breaks free of Kash and attacks Diamond Dave. Johnson goes after the Jester as Kash, who was low-blowed by Douglas, rests. Before long, Diamond Dave is resting. Douglas rakes Kash's eyes over the top rope and Johnson is all over The Jester. Then The King goes after Diamond Dave. Johnson still works on The Jester. The Jester counters the attack. Douglas goes after Kash. Then Douglas and The Jester double team Johnson. Johnson rallies and double clotheslines Douglas and the Jester. With that, some fans stand and cheer. Johnson is close to eliminating The Jester but that's broken up. Diamond Dave goes over the top rope and is the first eliminated. Kash goes after The Jester before Douglas breaks it up. Kash kicks Douglas in the hamstrings. Douglas is nearly spilled out but he stays on the apron. Johnson misses a splash on The Jester, who tries to toss the Jr. Heavyweight Champ over the top. Jester kicks Johnson in the head and spills him over. Now it's The Jester and King versus Kris Kash. Kash attacks both men. Jester rebounds and attacks Kash. They double suplex Kash but he reverses it for a double DDT. The Jester is tossed over the top rope. Now it's Kash and Douglas. Douglas is all over Kash. Douglas is tossed over the top rope. Kris Kash is the winner! Douglas and Jester return to the ring and attack Kash. Interim Kommissioner Gentleman Joe Perri hastily comes onto the ring apron. He orders that Kash and Douglas start a new match.
Kris Kash v. Del Douglas
The bell rings and Douglas immediately goes to work on Kash with knees to the midsection. With Kash down, Douglas gets Kash into a submission move. Douglas pushes his knee into Kash's back. Then there's an elbow drop. Kash kicks out at one. Douglas grabs Kash's crotch and gives him a chop. Douglas goes for the fist from the top rope and lands it. It's all Douglas. Clothesline falls Kash. The Royal Sharpshooter is next. In the middle of the ring, Kash begs off referee Jimmy James. Douglas eventually lets it go and gets a two count on Kash. Douglas suplexes Kash. Leg drop. Two count. Kash is in the corner. Douglas turns his ire on the Krazies. He whips Kash into the corner and Kash flips out onto Douglas. Both men are down. Kash is up and suplexes Douglas. Kash whips him into the corner and follows with his patented tilt-a-whirl drop kick. Douglas is spilled to the outside. Kash launches himself over the top rope onto Douglas. The Krazies are in a frenzy. The count out begins. Douglas is rolled in. Kash sets him up for a whip. Douglas is down. Leg drop from the top rope. Unbelievably, Douglas kicks out at two. On his way up to his feet, Douglas lands a low blow. He goes for Drop it Like It's Hot finishing move but Kash fights it off and lands a twisting neck breaker. Douglas is down. Kash goes for the Swon Ton off the top and Kash wins again!
Tag Team Match: Legion of the Apocalypse (w/Mayor Mystery) versus Great Toyota and Ric Rumsky
Rumsky is all over The Blood Beast in the early going, but Beast battles back, using his superior strength. Blood Beast bodyslams Rumsky and tags in Jonny Axx who continues the offense. Referee Justin Smith is distracted by Mayor Mystery as Axx and Beast double-team Rumsky. There's a pin attempt but that's broken up by Great Toyota. More double-teaming. Rumsky gets a burst of energy and battles back against Axx. He goes for a pin but Beast breaks that up. Rumsky continues on the offense. He gets Axx in a front face lock and backs up into the corner and tags in a fresh Toyota. Toyota gets Axx down for a pin but he doesn't get a single hand slap to the canvas. Referee Smith is in the way enough to distract Toyota. As a result, the Legion gets the advantage. Blood Beast is all over Toyota. Blood Beast almost ended Toyota's career earlier this year. Mayor Mystery uses his cane on Toyota's throat but the import battles back. There's a two-count on Beast. Toyota goes for another cover but Blood Beast kicks out. Beast drops a series of elbows. The Legion double-teams Toyota for a double suplex. Axx gets a two-count. Then a couple of elbow drops. Toyota somehow gets the offense and drives Axx into the mat. Toyota crawls toward Rumsky. He makes the tag, just as Beast tags Axx. Mystery blasts Toyota with his cane. That's enough. Beast rolls him up for the one, two, three. The Legion wins the match. Ric Rumsky grabs the microphone. He challenges the Legion to a tag team match at FanFest with a surprise tag team partner!
Jr. Heavyweight Championship: The Jester (w/Del Douglas) v. Tony Johnson
Referee Jimmy James calls for the bell and the Jester cartwheels. The two combatants lock up. Jester gets the champ from behind. Johnson breaks it up. Johnson slams Jester down in the center of the ring. The Jester does the same thing to Johnson. Jester gets a front-face lock then Johnson breaks that up. Jester shoulder blocks Johnson down. Jester is in the ropes. Johnson kicks him. There's a two count but Jester kicks up. Johnson gets Jester in a headlock. Jester powers out of it and lands a series of forearm shots to Johnson's back. Jester lifts Johnson up and bodyslams him in the center of the ring. Jester runs the ropes and drops a knee onto Johnson's sternum. Two count. Jester gets Johnson into the middle rope. Jester distracts James and Douglas attacks Johnson in the ropes. The fans are going crazy but James doesn't notice. Jester gets Johnson in a front face lock, lowers some more forearms then suplexes him. Two count. Jester kicks Johnson in the back. Johnson is down. Jester is on his feet, measuring every accompanying blow. Two count. Jester puts more boots to Johnson. Johnson dodges a sunset flip and nearly gets a pinfall. Still weary, Johnson is leveled by The Jester. Another two count. Jester kicks the prone Johnson. Another two count. Jester puts his boot on Johnson's throat. Jester lifts Johnson up in the corner for a superplex. Johnson battles him off. Johnson climbs to the top. A flying body press leaves Jester down for two. The crowd explodes as the pin seemed a certainty. Jester bodyslams Johnson. Two count. Jester is ready. Johnson comes out of nowhere with a knee to Jester's mush. Both Megastars are down. Johnson is up for a clothesline. Then another. A back elbow. Jester is reeling. Whipped for a side slam. Johnson points up. He's slow getting to the top. Jester is down. A huge knee from the top turnbuckle. Both men are down, as Johnson hurt his knee with the move. Jester rallies and knocks Johnson down. A single-legged Royal Crab is next. Johnson battles to the ropes. He comes out of nowhere with a drop kick to the Jester's chin. The pin is a three count and Johnson retains the Jr. Heavyweight Championship!
KSWA Heavyweight Championship: Mitch Napier v. Ali Kaida
Mayor Mystery asks that the Krazies not chant "USA, USA." They do. In volumes. Mitch Napier goes on the offensive with a shoulder block but Ali Kaida battles out. Napier is whipped into the corner than is hit with a big splash. Kaida then slams Mitch down in the center of the ring with incredible force. Kaida goes for a submission move by contorting Napier's neck. Mayor Mystery is berating fans at ringside. Mitch is dumped outside, into the clutches of Mayor Mystery. Kaida distracts him enough. Mitch is rolled back in. Kaida is still on the offensive. Mitch lands a cross body block. He follows that up with fists and a leg drop. Mitch goes to the top rope for a big elbow. Two count. Mitch lands another cross body block, this one from the top rope. Two count. Ali Kaida goes to the hardwood floor. Kaida and Mayor Mystery ask for a time out. Mitch attacks. Kaida rebounds and whips him into the ring steps. Kaida tosses him back inside. Mitch is slow in getting up. Kaida cheers for himself. That's enough for Mitch to rebound. Mitch gets Kaida down with a Fireman's carry. Kaida is down. Mitch goes to work on his knee. Mitch tries to end it with the Sioux Falls Slam. Kaida battles out of it. Napier gets him up and lands it! Mitch goes for the cover but Mayor Mystery breaks it up by pulling Mitch's leg from the outside. All three men are on the outside of the ring. They battle it out on the outside. They are counted out. Ali Kaida remains the KSWA Champ going into FanFest.
Six Man Tag Team: Canadian Perfection & Martin v. Flash and Party Gras
It's bedlam as Flash and Party Gras enter the arena. Dozens upon dozens of kids are dance with Lord Zoltan, Justin Sane and Flash. Dr. Devastation Lou Martin says he will leave if kids in attendance do not stop dancing. The fans then chant "USA, USA" to disrupt the Canadians. Flash starts out with Goulet. Goulet flattens Flash with a shoulder block. Flash counters with a move of his own and drops Goulet. The Perfection One bails to the outside. Flash leaps onto them from the inside. Frank Durso chokes Flash on the outside. Flash rolls Goulet back in and lands a series of high-impact moves. There's a two count. Flash tags in Lord Zoltan. Zoltan gets Goulet in a front face lock. Zoltan tags in Justin--maybe--who suplexes Goulet. Goulet battles back and is able to tag in Lou Martin. Martin goes to work on Sane but he battles back enough to tag Zoltan. Zoltan and Sane then double team Martin. Then there's a series of whips in which Martin is tagged and beaten by all three: Zoltan, Sane and Flash. Special guest referee Eric Crouse is way over his head with Party Gras' shenanigans. Zoltan wants to kick Martin in the most private of areas. He does when Crouse's back is turned. Sane pins Martin for an eternity before Crouse catches up. There's a two count. Martin somehow gets offense and lands Sane for a two count. Goulet is tagged back in. At more than seven minutes, Drew Belanger has yet to see action. Goulet drops elbows on Sane and gets a two count. At 7:30, Belanger is tagged in for the first time. Sane is double and tripled teamed. He gets to his corner and tags in Flash. Flash goes to work on Belanger. Belanger recovers. There's a two count on Flash in the center of the ring. Belanger kicks a seated Jay Flash. Crouse counts to two. Goulet is tagged in. They double team Flash for a two count. Goulet is slow and methodical on Flash. Crouse is distracted by Goulet. Frank Durso attacks Flash on the outside. Flash gets up and pins Goulet for a two count. Goulet does the same and gets Flash down for two. Flash is rammed into a corner. Goulet whips Flash into the corner and the South Beach Soldier flips out onto a flying cross body block. He gets to the corner and tags Zoltan. Zoltan tags Sane, who suplexes Lou Martin, who has been tagged in. Both men are met with a double clothes line. Sane and Martin are down in the center of the ring. Sane tags Zoltan. All six men are in the ring. The opponents are in three corners. Goulet, Belanger and Martin fall on each other in a big pile. Flash hits the cannonball. Sane hits the Shock Therapy Frogsplash. All three opponents are piled onto each other for the three count. The winners: Party Gras and Jay Flash!
After the match, Party Gras dance in the fever pitch and invite about 100 kids into the ring. They dance in unison as Sir Mix A-Lot's "I Like Big Buts" plays to its conclusion.
Main Event: The Latin Assassin v. Shawn Blanchard (w/Frank Durso)
It's slow going on the outset as the long-time foes feel each other out as kids at ringside chant "VIP's suck." Latin gets Blanchard down for a two-count. Latin keeps Blanchard is a headlock as Blanchard powers up. Blanchard drops Latin with a back elbow. Blanchard chokes Latin but gives up just as Jimmy James counts to four. Blanchard distracts James long enough for Durso to choke Latin on the bottom rope. Blanchard goes low on Latin and he falls outside. Frank Durso meets Latin on the outside with a choke. James is distracted by Blanchard. Blanchard goes out and slams Latin's head into the ring apron. Durso has James distracted for minutes on end as Blanchard attacks a prone Assassin. Blanchard lands a right fist into Latin's forehead. Blanchard tries to DDT Latin on the outside but Latin powers out, enough to drop Blanchard onto the floor. Latin gets his first appreciable offense before Blanchard counters. Blanchard rolls Latin back in the center of the ring. He drops an elbow. Two count. Blanchard gets Latin in a reverse chin lock. Durso climbs the stairs to the apron. Latin begins to power out of Blanchard's clutches. He whips Blanchard into the corner, only to be met with a back elbow. Blanchard climbs the top turnbuckle, and is tossed to the middle of the mat by Latin. Latin gets Blanchard in the corner for a series of fists. At 10, Latin relents and hip tosses Blanchard to the mat. Latin sunset flips Blanchard and gets a two count. Then another. Latin gets Blanchard in a chin lock. Latin powers Blanchard down. Blanchard is whipped in the corner and he goes over the top rope. He's then met with a clothesline on the outside apron. At the five count, Blanchard pulls Latin out onto the floor. That's where they continue to battle. Blanchard has Latin down. James tries to get Durso away from the action. Blanchard whips Latin's arm into the ring post then tosses him back in. Blanchard goes to work on Latin's right arm. Then he contorts the left arm back and grinds Latin into the mat. Blanchard lets go and drops an elbow on Latin's left arm. Durso once again climbs to the apron. Latin, out of nowhere, hits the Flying Lariat for the win! Post match, Latin celebrates and Blanchard gathers his composure in the ring. On the way back to the locker room, Latin plasters Durso with a hand right.
Now it's on to FanFest for the Megastars of the KSWA and their fans.